1) RE-LANGUAGE PRINCIPLE
Rename your problem as something else.
How crazy is that.
Because we all know that a rose by any other name is still a rose.
Turns out that does not apply to problems
because a problem by any other name
has a different effect on the physiology of the body.
Studies show that our body reacts at the hormonal level
to words we say,
words others say,
even words we think.
A patient in the hospital
heard a conversation between a doctor and a nurse
having what he thought was a negative conversation
about his chance of survival being nil.
He got sicker and almost died until he was told of his misunderstanding.
A patient on deaths door heard what he thought was a positive conversation
between a doctor and nurse
who were actually discussing bringing in the family for a last goodbye
and he recovered within days.
Turns out both patients were wrong ,
thinking a positive was a negative
and a negative was a positive.
But the body heard
what the patient thought was the truth
and responded accordingly
because our body believes what we tell it.
So re-language the word Problem into something else
Call it a Challenge, an Opportunity or a Daisy ( the flower)
It does not matter.
Just call it something which makes you feel upbeat, inspires you,
or makes you smile.
An exterior smile is an interior smile
and your insides likes good news,
and your insides and outsides both think better when you are relaxed and in harmony.
2) SIMPLIFY PRINCIPLE
Keep it simple
How crazy is that.
Problems are problems because they are complicated.
Einstein said “ Genius is making the complex simple “
Often Daisies are Daisies because we are looking at the complete flower
and we cannot see the individual parts.
Identify the parts ( the petals ) and tackle them one at a time.
The band does not show up at your reception.
- there will be no first dance
- People will not get to dance,
- people will be upset,
- you cannot afford to pay for another band.
- your wedding reception is ruined
- you need music
Select the one petal called - you need music.
There is a good chance one or more of your guests
either used to play in a band, or still do play in a band.
Go to the microphone and ask them to come forward.
Then find a store which rents the instruments.
There is a good chance you and everyone in the room is on social media.
Use it to find someone who would drop what they are doing and perform
for free food, a good audience and a little money.
Are you in a large hotel.
Can they pipe in dancing music for your event.
3) SIMILARITY PRINCIPLE
How crazy is that.
Problems are not the same, how to solve them cannot be the same.
Yet the truth is
any Daisy in the world at any moment has appeared before
and a petal replacement solution was found by someone.
Seek out those who went before you.
Use Google, use your digital social network
seek out friends, reach out to others
both in your field, outside of your field
and especially outside of your inner circle.
The best ideas of miniaturising overgrown Daisies
can often come from someone who has never seen a Daisy like yours.
Louis Pasture was a chemist
who came up with a solution which medical doctors needed
and did not know they had a Daisy.
And of course they resisted his expertise because he was not in their field.
Thanks to his stubbornness we now have pasteurisation
and now our doctors and dentists wash their hands and wear gloves
before they do surgery making sure you are not cross contaminated
from their other patients or from microbe which got on their hands,
hiding on something they ate at lunch
and increasing our life expectancy just from personal hygiene.
4) BACKWARDS CAN BE FORWARDS PRINCIPLE
How Crazy is that.
Got a Daisy in your flowerpot
which is bigger than you and blocking out the sun.
Take a step back and see it from a broader view
Sometimes what we need to see
can only be seen when we look up and over the Daisy.
Lost your job
Got served divorce papers.
Your Daisy just grew thorns
Courage is being afraid and moving forward despite the fear.
So take it slowly, accept that the thorns are going to hurt and step back
to take a look at the Thorn Riddled Daisy Field from a distance.
Neither of those major events happened overnight
and planting a new garden does not happen overnight either.
You have been pushed out of the work nest, time to go big or go home.
Take retraining for a skill which you always wanted to do but were too scared to try.
Learn a new language and move to that country and get a dream job there.
Take the time to re-learn who you are.
When we are in a relationships we have to make compromises
some small some big and we can often end up
being a person even we do not like.
Sometimes a divorce is because we became someone
other than the person the other spouse married.
and sometimes someone we do not even like.
Time to take a deep breath and look at ourselves
and re-evaluate who we really want to be when we grow up.
5) THE SLEEP PRINCIPLE
How crazy is that.
Sleeping through a daisy does not make it go away.
If the Daisy is staring at you and you cannot see the petals for the stem
get a good nights rest.
Just before you go to sleep ask yourself to create a solution while you sleep.
It actually works.
6) THE MANAGE NOT FIX PRINCIPLE
How crazy is that to not even try to fix a daisy.
Some Daisies can never be fixed or made to go away.
Their roots are too deep , they are being nourished by others
who love to wallow in Daisies, or it is being created by people over whom
you have no control.
Sometimes we just have to manage those Daisies.
Work around them.
Build a Moat around them
Prevent yourself from being collateral damage
Got crazy people in your extended family,
crazy co workers driving you crazy.
Manage them at the level they are behaving.
Are they behaving like a spoiled bratty two year old.
Then manage them as you would a spoiled bratty two year old.
Teach them that they can get from you what they want
when they start to behave
not by telling them
but by showing them through your behaviour.
We never try to manage a two year old
by yelling at them to stop acting like a two year old.
No, instead, we accept that a two year is what they are and adjust accordingly.
Same principle applies to adults who revert to the behaviour of a two year old.
The duration of their visit to the good ol’ days of being two
will be defined by how much attention they get for choosing that behaviour.
Talk to them calmly.
Isolate yourself from them until they self soothe.
Ignore them until they settle down.
Walk away from their temper tantrum.
When they have calmed down then you offer to be of help
If they are repeat offenders then avoid them whenever possible.
7) THE MOEBIUS LOOP PRINCIPLE
Astrophysicists refer to it as is a twist in the fabric of space
where time becomes a loop, from which there is no escape.
How crazy is that.
And what does it have to do with Daisies
It means that Daisies beget Daisies which in turn beget Daisies
So as you De-petal your current Daisy another one will arrive.
So relax and accept that there is always another Daisy around the corner
to challenge you to conquer your fears, to hone you
to shape you and to frustrate you.
Daisies may shape you
BUT DAISIES NEVER EVER DEFINE YOU.
Because we went crazy and
- Renamed them to make us smile
- Simplified them
- Found solutions from others
- Stepped backwards to see it from a broader view
- Slept on it
- Managed them instead of solving them
- Accepted that they are infinite in numbers
Something good always comes out of a failure or a great mistake.
Until next time
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